Yes, do you want to be successful or do you want to be right? Why am I asking this question you may ask? Well, we’ll see as we go along on this post.
It’s fair to say that there is a recipe for success, just like there is a recipe to make a certain dish or cake. Now just like for a literal recipe you may add or change a few ingredients, but if you didn’t put the main ingredients in, you might not come up with an eatable dish or cake at all.
In order to come up with a particular dish or cake there are some basic rules you’re going to need to follow.
I think it’s fair to say that successful people tend to follow the same type pattern (recipe) and unsuccessful people tend to follow the same type pattern (recipe) as well. There may be few differences here and there, just like in the cake recipe, but the vital ingredients are usually there.
The reason I came up with this post idea is because I noticed a very important fact in my coaching so far – it’s much harder (not to say almost impossible) to help people who are not willing to follow simple recipes to succeed, than those are willing to change their beliefs.
Whatever it is that forbid them to open up their mind fully will, unfortunately, prevent them to reach the type of success they say they want. When this fact becomes so obvious and bigger than the elephant in the hall way, I usually ask the person the question, do you want to be successful or do you want to be right?
But what do I mean by this?
What I mean is are you still clinging to some useless beliefs that is clogging your life?
You Limited Beliefs could be very Costly
Just like a road block in the middle of a highway can create a huge traffic jam, because it prevents the traffic to flow, or a clog in your sink drain can prevent the water to go through and create a catastrophic flood in your bathroom, limited beliefs can prevent you to succeed in your business, finances, relationships and other areas of life as well.
But what’s a Limited Belief, Exactly?
A limited belief is really anything and everything that you and I may believe, whether it has any ground or not.
The two most two huge vehicles responsible for limited beliefs of the human race are 1) culture and 2) religion. After that we also may have an incredible amount of limited beliefs based on our personal upbringing, whatever’s been put in our heard subconsciously, and our own misinterpretation and conception of things. That’s a whole lot of limited beliefs from everywhere.
What are yours?
Whether you like it or not, many of those limited beliefs are what’s between you and your success.
What is the Best Way to Get Rid of Limiting Beliefs?
One of the best ways to get rid of limiting beliefs is asking yourself questions about any belief that you may have, but before you even do this you need to know those 3 things about beliefs.
1) Most of us have not “consciously “chosen our beliefs. They come from our environment. Culture, religion, family, ancestry and so on.
2) Some of our beliefs are based on our own interpretations, and experiences. Not necessarily on truth.
3) We tend not to question beliefs that were implanted in us early in life. On the contrary we tend to accept them as facts whether they are or not.
Now ask yourself the following questions:
- How many beliefs do you think you have had since before you can even remember?
- Are such beliefs based on proven facts?
- How many of your beliefs have you actually decided about consciously?
- How can you back up any belief that you have?
Remember that taking control of your beliefs means taking control of your life.
Do you Want to Improve your Life or do you want to Keep your Limiting Beliefs?
Just yesterday, I was on the phone with someone I’ve been helping, and while on one hand this person wants to take control of their life, on the other hand they are still riddled with limiting beliefs that’s holding them back. Way back.
They are emotionally drained doing something that makes them so unhappy, while preventing them to advance on their project.
As an excuse this person brings up to me that their deep down belief is that as human we are punished and destined to live a life of torment any way. In their case, it’s a religiously-based belief that they based on Holy Books.
This is a deep down entrenched belief that many people have out there. The belief that struggling and suffering is an inherited part of human life, and that, therefore, we can’t avoid it.
Once thing that I’ve discovered over the years (because I’m no different than anyone else and have been carried away by the same type beliefs anybody else has) is this: The more you believe beliefs that are outside of you, the more limiting they will tend to be. The more you’ll learn how to connect spiritually from the inside, the more guided you will be and the more successful you’ll become.
The Example of Intuition
Let’s take intuition for example. There isn’t any official manual for mankind that tell us what intuition is and why we should use it. Or even if it’s OK or if it’s wrong to us it. But we tend to automatically know that intuition is a good thing and that it’s there to guide us. We all have examples where we can remember having or not having listened to our intuition and the results that created.
Our intuition is our protector. It comes from our higher self – it comes from inside us.
But what about if you had a belief that tells you that using your intuition is a bad thing, or that if you did you’ll be punished somehow? Do you think that would hinder you from using or even listening to your intuition? You bet it would. Such belief would be an intuition killer, so to speak.
If you had such belief you would deny your intuition every time you have one until you’d probably had no more.
Bottom line, be very careful of what you believe, because your beliefs could pretty much make the difference between happiness, and misery, success and failure and even life and death.
A good exercise that I’ve learned from Tony Robbins is to question all my beliefs. That’s an excellent exercise. I started doing this at age 40, and boy was it a revelation to me!
I started to analyze all the big beliefs that I had and tried to figure out where they were coming from and how much I could trust them if at all. I didn’t care about being right, I cared more about turning my life around to see success at the end of the tunnel.
This is an excellent exercise that I recommend you do at least once in your life. But it’s even better if you do it every time you become AWARE that you’re acting upon a particular belief.
Every time you feel that you’re acting on autopilot; try to find out if you’re acting based on a limiting belief of yours. Ask yourself the question, what is the foundation of such belief and does it serve me?
Sometimes it’s Just Easier to Keep our Old Beliefs
You would think that any intelligent human being would be ready to get rid of any encumbering belief to feel free and embrace success, but you’d be wrong. Some of us would rather be right, than successful.
Why? Because getting rid of old beliefs, at times takes courage, and it’s admitting that we were wrong. Getting rid of some of my old beliefs cost me more than I’m willing to tell you here on a blog post, because that’s not something that people around you take very well at all. Was it worth it, though? You bet it was!
If you still feel stuck, unhappy, and not as successful as you’d like to be, it’s probably because you still have some old beliefs that are in the way.
Once you’re ready to look at the truth in the face, you can start to get rid of them. You can do this on your own or you can hire a coach to help you with that. It’s your your call. It all depends how much you want it.
So, there you have it. Where do you stand when it comes to deep down entrenched beliefs? Are you aware of them? Are you willing to look at them more closely? Or are you even aware of them at all? Please, let us know in the comments below!
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Hi Sylviane,
Wow. This is a great post. It really got me thinking about what is stopping me from taking risks. I can recall a few times my intuition was telling me to go for it but my head was filled with overpowering thoughts of why I shouldn’t.
I’m a fan of Tony Robbins too :).
I took a moment to think about where my beliefs come from. A lot of them were handed down to me by my parents meaning I can easily create new beliefs for myself. right? It’s not set in stone.
Thanks for putting this post together for us! I truly enjoyed reading it!
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Hi Corina,
I see you’ve got a new picture 🙂
Usually, intuition is ALWAYS right, and our head is wrong. Every time I made a mistake not listening to my intuition it was that head that came in the way “my ego,” but now I know better how to use my intuition. Intuition comes from a higher place.
Yes, the largest part of our beliefs were passed on to use by adults when we were kids, and many of them can be changed indeed. Any belief can be changed if we want to.
I’m so glad you seemed to have enjoyed this topic 🙂 Thanks for coming.
Hi Sylviane,
I remember writing about limiting beliefs a while ago. I think the key to unraveling them is to challenge our own assumptions, beliefs, and memes. Dr. Bruce Lipton has written an excellent book on the subject called The Biology of Beliefs, an excellent read.
Another key to unlocking limiting beliefs is awareness. If you don’t know about them, you remain in the dark. But with awareness comes enlightenment and a clarion call to action.
All the best for a pleasant remainder of the week and upcoming weekend!
Bill
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Hi Bill,
I’m very familiar with Dr. Bruce Lipton, but I’ve not read that book yet, thank for mentioning it, I will check it out as learning about beliefs is something that passionate me so much, because we are all victim of them.
I agree, awareness is the first thing to unlock limiting beliefs. We can’t heal something we’re not even aware of.
Thank you for your valuable input and have a great week end as well!
Sylviane Nuccio invites you to read..Do You Want To Be Success Or Do You Want To Be Right?
Hi Sylviane,
This is such an incredibly awesome topic because I need to remind myself of this more than even I can imagine. My personality type always tends to take me to the side where I want to be right and many times I notice myself going along with the flow. Yes, I have to retreat many times and fix the damage but sometimes, it has caused me pain.
Yes, I am aware of it and I have been working on this side of my mind for a while. It just seems to improve very slowly you see. But I know I am work in progress.
Thank you for this great reminder and helpful tips.
Regards,
Kumar
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Hi Kumar,
Don’t worry you’re not the only one. Beliefs are probably the strongest of all hold that we may have. For two main reasons: 1) We’re not even fully conscious of half of them and 2) We like to hold on of some beliefs because they’ve been there for so long and they’re attached to our parents and culture big time!
Now, those are the 2 main reasons, but there are even more reasons out there why we have limited beliefs, so that’s why I’m saying that’s the strongest hold most of us have.
Only with the beholder’s WILL can they be changed.
Thanks for sharing this and have a wonderful day!
Sylviane Nuccio invites you to read..Do You Want To Be Success Or Do You Want To Be Right?
What a great share Sylviane and at times I catch myself still doing this but now I have the tools to step back and be aware of it.
The question you asked would you rather be successful or right is one that I think a lot of people probably have issues with. I mean we both know some people right! Dog gone it they’ve just got to be right no matter what and they can’t even see this for themselves. I just want to shake them at times but unless they’re ready to see this for themselves they’ll continue down that very same road.
I think we all just have to be open to change. Be open to the fact that some of our old beliefs no longer serve us and there is nothing wrong with that. It’s just that we’ve evolved and are going different places in our lives. Just be open to it though, that’s the first step.
Great share and thanks for bringing this one up. A topic I’m sure a lot of people probably don’t want to deal with but hopefully will recognize that it’s time to do something about that.
~Adrienne
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Hi Adrienne,
Yes, I’m afraid we all know some people that would rather be right, than successful, because it’s too hard for them to let go on some though beliefs of theirs. There’s nothing one can do for those individuals until they decide to change themselves.
I know that this type of blogs do not attract those people, so, they won’t even read this, but hopefully the ones who are just about ready will.
Thank you for your input, Adrienne 🙂
Hi Sylviane,
I love the part about limiting beliefs and I agree that those come from childhood and how you were brought up. There are a lot of people that I have met that can’t stand to be wrong even if they are.
I’m sure that has to do with their upbringing and there are limiting beliefs. Only we can change the path we take. If we don’t believe we can do it, then we can’t.
Thanks so much for the thoughtful post. Oh and congratulations on getting your certificate for coaching, that is a fabulous accomplishment. 🙂 .
Talk soon,
Geri
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Hi Geri,
So sorry for the late reply here. My world has been a bit upside down lately, and trying to make the best of it 🙂
I know what you mean. Don’t we all know some people that are completely wrong? Yet they seem to be the most heard-headed people, in general.
I limiting belief can really hold your back your whole life, so we need to beware.
Thanks for your input and have a wonderful week ahead!
Sylviane Nuccio invites you to read..Do You Want To Be Successful Or Do You Want To Be Right?
Hey Sylviane,
This is pretty darn deep! Yes we all have limited beliefs. In my case, a lot of my limited beliefs were formed after elementary school. A lot of them I can’t believe it was holding me back looking back on them.
But yes, I know a couple of people that are like the person you described here on your post. They believe they were just doomed for failure and the struggle for the rest of their lives. They also believe that because of their age they should just give up on life period. But when i question their beliefs and point out some facts, they get pretty offended. I guess you can say they would rather be right then to get out of their situation.
But I really believe in those “conspiracy theories”… I think the reason why a lot of people, including myself, have these limited beliefs that were passed down was for us to be under control and not go beyond certain levels in life. I got this idea from looking back on my life and the people that I’ve met, plus after reading Robert Kiyosaki’s “Conspiracy Of The Rich” which I highly recommend.
Thanks for sharing Sylviane! Have a great weekend!
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Hi Sherman, and first let me apologize for the late rely here. Not because I don’t appreciate your comment though 🙂
I know what you mean about people simply getting offended when you question their beliefs. People like these are impossible to help, until they decide to change.
Oh boy, I’m so glad you’re mentioning the “conspiracy theories.” Sometime this year I’ve got to write about this. There is a 2 hour documentary that you can find on YouTube titled “Thrive” that talked all about it in length. There’s stuff in there that will give you Aha moments. I used to love standing show man George Carlin because he also talked about that in his shows quite often.
We are part of society that’s pretty much under the control of a few multi-billionaires that are after two things, and two things only 1) power and 2) money. It’s sad to say, but they are not interested in a society that believes in healing itself and attracting money. They’d rather you be broke, dumb and sick, so they can control you better. So many people don’t even know that fact yet.
Thanks for your excellent input and have a wonderful, successful week!
Sylviane Nuccio invites you to read..Do You Want To Be Successful Or Do You Want To Be Right?
I’m internet marketing expert and blogger by profession. In my country blogging expanding its network very quickly. But i think that if you want to achieve higher success in you field. You must have true focus on your work.