Money in Relationships: How to Talk about it?

money in relationships
Money in relationships

Love, time, and joy are subjects that couples talk about with ease, but one subject that is hard to discuss at times the subject of money. The following guide will help you talk about finances and money in relationships in a constructive way. 

Discuss Values Instead

Now that you are in a committed relationship, you are going to have to talk about money, and one of the best ways to start this conversation is to discuss your values. 

Talk about what is important to you regarding money rather than what you have saved up or what you two are making together. Once you’ve come to an understanding about each other’s values, you can steer your finances towards a place you want to be. If you and your partner care about saving, then you’ll focus on that, but if you both care about investing, then you want to figure out where to invest together.

Learn to Agree to Disagree

Yes, you’ll agree about some things, but you won’t agree on everything when it comes to money in the relationship. It’s important to recognize when you simply won’t come to an agreement so that you can learn to agree on your differences. The point of these types of conversations are not to win an argument or to convince one another, but to come to an understanding of each other’s point.

If you focus on the problem too much you might end up fighting, and there really isn’t a point to fighting. You could get into heated arguments that could lead to bad decisions. Learn to agree to disagree, and you’ll learn how to work together as a team because that is what you two are now. 

The subject of money in relationships is most certainly not the easiest one, but smart people find smart middle grounds.

Focus on Earning Rather Than Spending

The next thing you’ll have to do with your partner is to stop focusing on spending. Conversations about spending can be relationship poison because you start to judge what you spend money on. You may start to imply that your partner’s purchases are unnecessary or not important.

Saying something like this to your significant other can be hurtful, and that isn’t going to take the conversation to a constructive conclusion. What you want to focus on is earning. Try to talk about how you two can earn more or how you want to earn money. Find out what range figure will make you happy as long as your money-making route doesn’t contradict each other’s values. 

Do Your Best to Be Understanding

Mistakes are going to be made at some point. Yes, even if you have figured out a budget and are doing your best to stick with it, one of you or both may make a mistake. 

It’s important to learn from these mistakes so that you don’t repeat them, but you also cannot blame yourself or each other for these mistakes because they happen with money in relationships. You have to learn to put yourself in each other’s shoes so that you show understanding. You or your partner probably already feels bad enough about the financial blunder that was made, so don’t add insult to injury.

Learn About Financial Literacy

Some couples learn to talk about finances and money in relationships by working on a budget and dividing up money to pay the bills, but there is so much more to discuss. It may be a good idea for both of you to take financial literacy courses, which are available online. 

Once you’ve discussed taking these classes and completing them, you can begin to talk about your finances more effectively, which could help you two go where you want to go. These types of courses will teach you to save more, invest better, and may even help you find ways of adding new income to your household. Having the know-how and learning how to manage money in your relationship should help lift this particular burden from you a bit.

If you and your spouse ended up spending more than you should, you will undoubtedly find yourself in trouble when an unexpected emergency arises. Without proper savings, situations like a broken bone or emergency car repair can place both emotional and financial stressors on a relationship. Do your research should you need to evaluate short-term financial options like getting an online payday advance. The more prepared and honest you are, the more likely you will be able to make it past these financial stressors. 

Hopefully, these suggestions will help you communicate better when it comes to your money in your relationship.